“Griffith had to make himself strong!! But Griffith isn't a god!! A
person's heart can't be sustained by ideals and dreams alone!! You!! You
made Griffith weak!! He's no... Griffith's... no good without you!!!” Caska, Vol. 9 Ch.
many ways, Guts was Griffith’s anchor to sanity. While everybody else held him to the standard of
an infallible god, he felt he could relax and be himself around Guts.
Although Guts knew that Griffith
was very special, he was also able to accept him as a human being, with
mortal weaknesses and flaws. Guts was always outspoken, but never
judgmental, and truly the closest thing Griffith
ever had to a friend. More than that, Guts was the only person Griffith ever truly cared about. Sadly, since he had little experience with
had a tendency to take people for granted.
never came back to the barracks yesterday. I guess he really was in
Vol. 9 Ch.
if that wasn’t the understatement of the year! The floodgates were
open, and Griffith
had no clue how to deal with the torrent of emotions that assaulted his
painfully rational mind. What the hell happened? Things were going so
well. Why would he want to leave? Did he do something to drive Guts
away? How could he not foresee this? Should he be feeling angry, sad, or
bitter? Why did he care so much? Griffith
could manipulate his surroundings better than anyone, but he could not
handle losing control over himself. Desperate for a way to restore
stability, he clawed through the haze of mental chaos and aimed for the
one thing that was still in his power. Perhaps if he could shift his
focus back towards the realization of his dream, he could forget about
Guts. So what did he do?
Griffith?! Wh-what in the world are you doing?! In the rain... and at
Charlotte, Vol. 9 Ch.
right, he stood in the rain like a zombie waiting for Charlotte
to come to her room. She let him in through the window and fell into his
arms, sobbing about how much she missed him and worried when he was at
war, but his mind was elsewhere. Griffith
was here for one thing and one thing only: to speed up the process of
becoming royalty. It didn’t take him long to seduce
her, and soon they
were having wild, passionate sex on her bed. Well, at least
was zoning out throughout the whole thing and flashbacking about Guts.
And then, after Charlotte
fell fast asleep, he sat restless on the bed nursing the mark left by
Guts’ sword. I guess it could be said that he was still in shock at
being defeated, but come on! The guy just got done climaxing with a
female and all he could do was curl up in a fetus position and cry,
apparently longing for someone else.
“You believe that, don't you?” Guts, Vol. 9 Ch.
Speaking of flashbacking about Guts, there's that line from the Queen
assassination again. It is followed by a flashback of Guts leaving. What
could this mean? How are those two scenes connected?
When those words were spoken a month earlier, they were words of
encouragement, assuring Griffith that Guts would stand by him in
pursuing the dream forever. He thought he could enjoy the fruits of his
ambition and have the emotional satisfaction of someone to
share it with. But he was wrong, the path of relationships had betrayed
him, and he truly was alone.
It is important to note that of all the flashbacks Griffith would
have, none of them were about losing a swordfight. Instead, they
focused exclusively on his emotional attachment to Guts. Proud as he
was, the shock of his first defeat seemed petty compared to the pain of
losing his closest friend.
So, in the end, was it worth it? If the
paths of love and ambition were mutually exclusive, did he pick
the right one? Perhaps the reason he saw those memories back to back was
because he was weighing Guts' presence in his life against his dream as
personified by Charlotte.